labor nurse has been reborn and shares her experiences as a new nurse-midwife, woman, and blogger

Monday, August 18, 2008

No Independent Thinking

Yesterday my preceptor told me that I should not have opinions. I have to laugh at this now, because clearly she hasn't really learned who I am. But at the time I couldn't believe that she said this.

The context of the conversation was about my own midwifery practice; she felt that only experienced midwives should have opinions about how they practice. I nodded and went along with this conversation because, frankly, if I disagreed it would just make matters worse. And what I walked away with was that even though I am supposed to be a safe beginning practitioner at the end of this experience, that I should just be doing everything she suggests or asks of me.

So I will, because ultimately my fate is in her hands with regards to passing and graduating. But it is frustrating when I am supposed to be setting my roots down and feel like a competent beginning midwife by the time I graduate that I still have to do things everyone else's way. I'd imagine that this is not a unique experience among student midwives; most preceptors want you to do things their way because it's what they do and it works for them. Or they think they are completely right.

Just a few weeks left.....I think I can handle it. I think....


Rixa said...

Yeah, that is pretty silly. I think it would be an advantage to have a student who challenges your ways of doing things. Wouldn't it make you examine what you are doing, and re-evaluate? Perhaps it would make you realize that some things aren't necessary, or perhaps are even harmful in some ways.

AtYourCervix said...

Sounds like nursing school ---- jump through the hoops, don't cause any ripples. Ugh. The end is near!! You can do this!

Loving Pecola said...

It sucks. It really does. I am currently interviewing midwifery students in different parts of the country and I can tell you that we are all feeling the same. Maybe the next generation will do something about it. There's something wrong with the way we're doing it...but we're too __________(?) to admit it. Hang in there, you're *so* close, you can do it!

You can do it.

You CAN do it.

loving pecola

Angi said...

Just do it their way while you have to. Then do what feels right when you're done with them.

Your moms will appreciate you for who you will become, and have better care, when you're comfortable.

Blessings from a doula with her own ideas too.