labor nurse has been reborn and shares her experiences as a new nurse-midwife, woman, and blogger

Thursday, June 11, 2009

The Midwife Sorceress

Ok, this is a personal issue, but one that I think many of you would find themselves as irritated about it as I am.

My husband has been on this tear of calling me the "Midwife Sorceress". I think that this comes from my recent career start (finally, I must say!) and that he's been on a wizards kick.

It annoys me.

Actually, it annoying the living fuck out of me.

Now, I know my husband is just being foolish. He usually can't let 5 minutes pass without doing something childish. However, he also knows that I am passionate about midwifery and try so very hard to dispel any myths about midwives. He's even done his fair share of teaching people around him about what I do when people ask him, "So what does your wife do?" to which frequently gets a response of "A mid-what?" or "Oh, so she delivers babies in the woman's home who is anti-doctor?"

So, clearly, he knows that midwives do not perform any magic or wave chicken feathers. But if anyone heard him call me a "Midwife Sorceress" they would easily conjure up images of what the "Midwife Problem" propaganda of 100 years ago provided- because this was such an effective campaign on part of obstetricians of the day much of the mainstream still believes much of what is said about midwives today.

I have solved this problem by providing a nipple tweak that he is sure to not forget next time he has an urge to call me a "Midwife Sorceress". So there!


Joyce said...

I enjoyed this story since I personally know both of you. DH is kidding of course; you hit the nail on the head - he likes to joke around and feels he can be himself and joke as he pleases with you.

I also think he is proud of you and knows how intelligent you are. He's just acting like a kid in 4th grade (which he enjoys).

Renee said...

Al hail the purple nurple!

AtYourCervix said...

He deserved a nipple tweak (or two) for that comment.

Reality Rounds said...

I switched to a Midwife for my second pregnancy so I could VBAC. Our primary midwife is good friends with my husband and I. But, when I was 38 weeks pregnant, my husband panicked,and wanted me to switch to a doctor. We had a conference with the midwives and discussed the plan of care and my hubby calmed down. I was so embarrassed I had to go through this with my midwife friends. They had to explain themselves to my husband, but my previous doctor did not get a second glance from hubby. Sigh. I would suggest a name change for "midwives" but that would not solve anything, would it?

A'Llyn said...


If it annoys you, he obviously shouldn't do it, but I actually think "Midwife Sorceress" sounds cool.

Too many fantasy novels, maybe. :)

Jack and Lexi's Mom said...

I wish I was a sorceress! I could just magic those babies right out of there. Oh, well....

Mama to Monkeys said...

I too find nipple tweaks to be an incredible behavior management technique in my home too.

Silly husbands!

mitchsmom said...

I'm a lactation consultant and my dh makes similar comments and jokes re: breastfeeding stuff, so I think I know how you feel. Think "titty committee", etc.

I don't really care if he does it in private (I do have a sense of humor ;), b/c I know that he actually supports it all in reality.
I'm lucky that he *usually* keeps it that way and says supportive comments in mixed company.

Bri said...

Instead of "midwife" he should refer to you as a nurse-midwife. That will effectively distinguish you from the people who “deliver babies in the woman's home who is anti-doctor.” It also changes people's idea of you from the image they have of DEMs or some old woman in India to something they recognize-- a trained individual who assists in birth.

Alas, the DEMs and six-month-training-course "midwives" of the US have co-opted the term midwife until it no longer, in the public consciousness, refers to a competent provider.

Soma said...

I had been a witness to several midwife-assisted births and can say that it's safe as long as the woman giving birth has no preexisting condition that can interfere with the birthing process such as high blood pressure or a high-risk pregnancy. Midwives also ensure that the patient's house is well-equipped with things needed for the birth. With proper precaution, a midwife assisted birth is easy, safe, and economical.